Narnia would have remained happy and gay forever but for a minor inconvenience. Puddulegum was here.

Now Aslan, despite all his great powers, was not all-knowing. He simply thought — Puddulegum is a good fellow, he deserves a nice afterlife. But how much of a good fellow Puddulegum was, he didn’t know. Puddulegum was happy to be with all others and others were happy and he kept saying that good times will not last forever and others obviously kept telling him that this is not so, we are already dead and there is nothing more to lose. High King Peter asked him to cheer up, Roonwit the dumb wit[1], Lucy the pussy, all kept working on him until he stopped creating anymore trouble. Not that he stopped thinking that good times will not last forever but he stopped saying so. Some say that even he thought that these good times would last forever but nevermind.

It so happened now that one day, when Queen Lucy was returning home after a nice party with nymphs and dryads and dwarfs after much dancing and merrymaking, she heard someone crying. NOW she felt a little trembling. Who could cry, in such a great land. Suddenly she heard a wail from far off. A centaur had shouted. She didn’t know that the demise had already begun.

Lucy reached there and found Jill. Though Jill first wanted to hide the fact and then didn’t want to tell she told finally that she remembers her parents and brothers and sisters. She explained her troubles thus. She couldn’t go to their land for she was already dead. She didn’t want others to come, for they will have to die first and oh, how bad death is. And Aslan says these times will last forever. Will they join her when they died? But then if it happened soon others too will start coming and this new Narnia will die of overpopulation. And then why cant she marry and have children for Aslan says that in this land of dead no NEW life can be generated. And she said a deep thing in between her tears. “Puddulgum was right. Damn it, he always is”.

Lucy gave a sensible suggestion. They should ask Aslan himself about this. Jill was afraid a bit but Lucy told her that it was not right to cry and be afraid in this land so sooner she got this out of their mind the better.

So they started running to Aslan’s cave. First they couldn’t believe their eyes. Aslan was looking sad! He was talking to a Centaur and didn’t notice that they have come. Finally the centaur was gone and Lucy and Pole went to Aslan and said “Hail Aslan. We come with a problem”. And Aslan growled and said, “Dumbwits can’t you see that my problems are bigger than yours? Why do you disturb me with your childish and girlish ones?” But soon he composed himself and told that he was sorry and they could say whatever they have come for. After shock and then a bit of steadying Pole told her story. Aslan listened with patience and when she finished he took a deep sigh and said, “I understand but there is little I can do. I could have brought everyone you would care for and everyone they would have cared for and so on, and have cleaned the earth of all life and brought all here (and mind you, my world is big enough to accommodate all, any finite infinity) , but no more. The stars are speaking. There has been a change in guard of the Supreme Council and the new ones are uneasy of my parallel system. Dear ones, my powers are drawing to a close. It was me who stopped you from having thoughts of the other world, I may confess. Soon this world would end. (What!, shouted the two.) What would happen to me and all of you I can’t say for sure. Perhaps all will dissolve into oblivion, and powers higher than me say that that is the truthful place of all.” The girls said “No,No” and started crying . Even Aslan the mighty dropped a tear or two. He started comforting them. But they won’t listen. Soon they ran off to tell the sad news to others.

But the news was in the air. The birds were not chirping as happily, the sky was no more so beautiful, the colours were not as bright. Everything started looking like a painting. Soon the news spread like fire everywhere. The kings of old (for there were no kings now) called a great meeting and Aslan himself came and told them the story. Since all were good people they told him, nevermind, thanks for all the good time you have given.

As everyone in our age knows, the dead are only figments of imagination. All the programs are loaded on a computer in the Headquarters of Supreme Council. It so happened that a lazy fellow, Witman the computer operator by that name, was tired after running for Aslan errands. Moreover Aslan was only in the program, but the powers had given him free run for his loyalty in ages past. After the new election there was a proposal to shutdown all non-productive systems and so it happened.

In a moment everything was gone.

Written for my sister 3 years back (i.e., in 2005). In Chronicles of Narnia the last book ends in a nightmare which the author tries to pass off as a dream-come-true! More unbearably, my sister liked it. So I ‘completed’ the series explaining what was wrong. It ends with some malice as you see. It is good work!

Added in 2018:
[1] Roonwit was a nice, stately, centaur.


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